Wednesday, June 24, 2009
I haven't seen my Mum for months. It hurts to see her. She wastes away in a nursing home compartmentalized with the other demented, waiting. Over 8 years ago she was beginning the signs of vascular dementia. Then, the fated fall that led to brain surgery, a slow "recovery" and then she was undone. She was the feminine side of us, she was our glue, she was our center post. She would have been a phenomenal grandmother. My oldest at twelve, knew her briefly and sweetly tries his best to connect to her. The other, never knew her as anything but this alien and is afraid. They lost out on so much without the benefit of her patience, love and mentoring. I need her and she no longer knows me. I am the youngest; everyone always said I was spoiled and had it the easiest. But she had me late in life and by the time I was mature enough to appreciate her, she was lost to me. My Mum.